IdraaK !

Bohat be-rabt batain hain,
Ajab shikway shikayat hain,
Na waqt sanjha hai,
NA qurbat ki talab ab hai,
Zindagi sab ki uljhi hai,
Kiun phir sirf hum ne socha hai,
Han wazan to khud he uthana hai,
So na naraz tum se hain,
Na he khud se roothay hain,
Pr kia karain bhai,
Zindagi ka waqt thora hai,
Hum isse darte hain,
Hum isse harain hain!!!
So ab se jahan b raho tum,
Jeete raho or khush raho tum,
Ab yehi soocha hai…

Loving the sky,
On a trip to joy,
Needs to lie,
Each day I try to,
Live and fly,
Yell and enjoy up above the sky!

I lost the fear,
of losing you again,
As once was enough for me,
Of what I had,
I no longer wish to see your face,
Neither I crave for your presence,
I am brave and I can go along,
Its just something with my eyes,
They water ever since,
I pass the pathways once we shared,
Its just they have something,
That made tears from my eyes roll away..

 

Mujhe tu apni he khabr naheen ab,
So kia tum se poochon main,
Naheen andaza ab waqt ka aur,
Thakan bas humsafar si hai,
Naheen koi majbori,
Nah he ab zaroorat hai,
Safar mushkil tu hai likin,
Umeed e sehr sath leli hai,
Ab koi naheen hai saath,
Na humdard na he humraz,
Faqt main tanha hon,
Jhurmat main seyahi k,
Na jane subhu kab hogi,
Naya koi chand nikle ga,
Har ik raat akhri hai,
Umeedon ki siskiyan aur main,
Chandni sar par sai’ban ban k chahyi hai,
Abhi to mukmal zaat hai likin,
Jab tum tanha ho jao ge,
Or hum yad ayenge,
Tu ansoon ka rela bahar ayega,
Ussay tab rok lena tum,
suna hai jo bhi jata hai,
wapis phir naheen ata,
Mera jana zarori hai,
Tumhara rukna naheen mumkin!

Tmhain kis ne kaha hai ye,
K main bhool payi hon,
Ghalat fehmi hai tumhari bas.
Na koi naya rasta talasha hai,
Na koi simt teh ki hai,
Ik jag hasai pe bas ankhain bheegi hain,
Meray dil ko yad hai tum ne,
Jis lamhay tora tha, laho ka ghusl dia tha,
Han bas us din he roi thi,
Par kahan jante ho k phir main kab soi hun,
Tamsha ban gayi thi main,
Bari thi hoi jag hasai bhi,
Main ik bar phir se lauti thi,
Umeed e wafa lekar teray shehr ayi thi,
Par wahan pohnchi to khabr ye suni main ne,
Tmaharay shehr walay,
Kisi or to tum se mansoob hain kar bethay,
Na phir junbish hoi ghanton,
Na main sans le payi,
Akaili main bhara majma’n,
Kharaba dil gaya lamha,
Na phir laut payi main na ruk kabhi payi,
Jo rasta teh kia mil kar,
Ussi pe hum bechar aye,
Wo rukhsat akhri thi apni,
Teray shehr main na phir kabhi aye!!

 

I always wanted to be sure,
Of everything I had and everything I do,
I each time put a step forward,
I did it with passion and so much effort,
With certainty to win and no hopes to lose,
But then one day,
I felt as if my feet’s are somewhere down,
Deeper then I could imagine,
Heavy and fatigue,
I tried hard with all my strength,
But nothing helped,
And then I remember the God of mine,
HE who created me once,
With a certainty of nothing but my return,
I felt the path was easy,
Though my feet still pained,
But a wave then came,
I took away the sand and my hostage feet,
They were set free,
Nothing changed,
The sea still was calm and waves were same,
But I was different,
The belief was born-again…

Mujhe abhi bhi dard hota hai,
Par main aj bhi isko zahir yun naheen karti,
K itnay baray jahan main sunaon kisko bhala apni,
Yahan to hal wo hai k,
Guzar jain jo chand log to afsos bhi bhari hai,
Koi mar jaye to ab giran na dil pe guzarta hai,
Na zara afsurdgi ch'hati hai,
Jahan zinda rehnay walon ko saza jeenay ki milti hai,
Or marne walon ko ,
Bhala unka kia tazkira karon main,
K wo begunah lashain kafan ko he tarasti hain,
Lahoo main doobi hoi lashain,
Wo piyaron ki ah’hain or sadain,
Main jab yeh sab sunti hon,
To ansoo poonch kar apne,
farsh se kuch bulndi par asman se zara agay,
Ik nighah e dard k hathon,
Pegham e ilteja rakh kar hawaon k naam karti hon,
K dukh unke baray honge jinke apne gaye honge,
MALIK! to unko sabr ab dena,
Or hosla bakhsh kar hisar apna zara karna,
K wo ashk ankhon main samaye,
Teri imdad k muntazir honge,
Mera kia hai?
Main aglee bar apni phir hajat minmina dongi,
Abhi unki sun le to jinhon ne lashain uthayi hain,
Lahoo main dobay piyaro'n ki qabrain banayi hain,
Aye Allah ab rehm ho in par,
Dukhon k ye satye hain…


- illusiOn~


I was depressed like every other time in start the theme was different but as I wrote it eventually turned to a different destination..

Abhi ye raat baqi hai,
Meri sanson main bhi rawani hai,
Magar kal jab yeh chand mujhe se mun mor kar,
Kis or dais main ja tu’lu hoga,
Main us waqt se darti hon,
Jab koi raat akhri hogi,
Libas e kafn urh kar main,
Phir nayi subh yun dekhon gi,
K kuhram e fugh’an,
mere charon tarf brpa hoa hoga,
Mera dil dob jata hai,
Bas ye anjam sooch kar he,
Kaise samna hoga kia mera muqam hoga,
Kia wo bakhshnay wala tab mehrba’n hoga,
Mera dil doob jata hai anjam e bewafai par,
Jo na dooba judai par wo khhon roota hai,
Ussay shanasai par,
Mujhe phir dar sa lagta hai,
Ankhain band karne se,
Thakan se chor hokar bhi,
Main garm bistar par narm takiye par,
Khuwabon ki chah lekar ankh band karti hon,
To anjam yad ata hai,
Wo sari ankahi batain, wo sari ghalat fehmi,
Wo jhagra wo badtameezi wo sab yad ata hai,
Mera dil kan’p jata hai,
Or wo Mehrba’n mujhko har bar maaf karta hai,
Neend ko naam wo mera ik naya pegham deta hai,
Zehn ko doob janay ka samaan deta hai,
Umeed e subh thama kar wo mujhe inaam deta hai..
- illusiOn~

Waqt ka takaza tha,
Jisse main chor aya tha,
Wo abhi tak akeli thi,
Usay to bhol jana tha or agay bharna tha,
Magar ye kia hoa k main,
Ab k jo us taraf aya  Khara usko waheen paya,
Wohi be-rbtgi si thi wohi andaz thay uskay..,
Wohi tevar puranay waheen atkay se ansoo thay,
Na janay kiun aas lagay wo khari waheen thi,
Pata to usay bhi tha mujhe naheen lut kar ana,
Meri manzil to agay thi bas saath he chotna tha,
Jab main tasleem kar betha to wo kiun mehv-e-intezar thi,
Jise main chor aya tha ussi ki yeh kahani thi..

Ajeeb dasht hai k ,
Zakhum alood jigar hai,
Babool jaise bana raha hai,
Nishan meri shikasta roh pe,
Main jiyon kaise,
Or maron main kiun kar?
Magar is shikasta’s roh se koi to poochay,
Koi to samjhaye,
Meri roh k zakhum hain aise,
K kar rahain hain jism ko \ghayal,
Main mar rahi hon na jee rahi hon,
Zakhum zakhum hon bas,
Lahoo lahoo hoi hun.

Tired are my hands,
Emotionally I failed,
Its just the platinum of my courage,
On which I stand,
I wanted to be like you,
Run away from the window,
As sorrow enters from the gate,
But do you think even,
if I follow your foot prints,
Will that  make me,
Happy ever after again???

- illusiOn ~

 Being apart from each other,
It was easy yet and a convenient choice,
Made by you and approved by me,
And now we both are towards our,
Different destinations!
Its fine with me but it hurts,
When each morning I see my pillow,
Wet and stained,
I hate myself why do I miss you?
It gets worst when dawn falls,
And I go somewhere,
Where you memories lies too,
I get mad on my companion,
I wish I could be mad at you,
As when you were going,
Taking things with you,
You tooth brush, your clothes shoes and accessories,
Why you forget them,
Didn't took them with you,
The memories we shared with in past few years,
I don’t want to rewind,
Here, take these with you,
Live them and feel how it is,
When every day you get up,
With a hope that you will live again,
But with pillow that is wet and stained..

- illusiOn ~

I met her again near the lake,
This time me sad and she felicitous,
I was burning with every breath I take,
Cigarette flames were the only light,
Silence as the only agonist among us,
Darkness was our only guide,
And then she shed the tears of love,
For one she loved and the one she had,
Her cries were loud deep in pain,
But what to do when the eyes rain,
Oh! how could I stop her and cease her pain,
As I was the reason , the hard-hearted Cain,
Should I tell her of all I faced,
I grieve on what I caused,
But my girl knows,
Things were beyond my reach,
She yelled and I heard her screaming,
I heard her and I turned,
Glared as if I heard all wrong,
How this could happen, my world seems fallen,
I felt like dying, dying all in,
I stared her face from forehead to her nose,
And her lips, yes those rose red lips,
That I once kissed,
They opened wide as if they wish to smile,
I cleared my throat and my watering eyes ,
I wiped them off as she was about to forgot,
Who I was,
I went near by with a wished to clutch her tight,
So that I could fly up light but how could I when,
’ She was in LOVE again ’!

- illusiOn ©

P.S( Its my first story in poetic way, just a try.. suggestions and corrections.. r welcum..)

I want to wear the dress of silence,
I want to be quite now,
As I no more can shout with a choked throat,
I seek an escape yes! I want to run,
I want to jump up and fly high,
I want to discover the world and hide,
It was never about ‘you’,
Yes! it was never about ‘us’,
All revolves around me,
It’s always about ‘I’..

 

 

Before my sun sets
let me dream
let me Muller my begrudge gleams
I want to run I want to rush
Before death makes me deem
As absence of hope
can stop my streams
But reams assures me
Wishes with hopes rapped in prayers
Can never be ceased..

-illusiOn~

I saw her down the valley,
Again, near the lake side; looking so lonely,
Cigarette burning between two fingers,
She looked dazed from crashed memories,
Quiet but awake,
Serene but crashed,
Soft but mistrusted,
Strong she looked yet weak too,
Lost beyond disturbance,
I could feel it always and she could see it never,
Her glittering eyes were deep in pain,
Busy, she was; in collecting her memories, her treasure,
Drowned in her dreams,
Shattered dreams that were dashed into pointed pieces,
Shards that wounded her hands while they gathered,
I could see blood, wounds and tears,
Glimpses of invisible shearing pain she felt,
I want her to be happy again,
I hope she finds love again,
But my desires and hopes have different paths to lead,
I take my eyes off her,
And leave her down the valley,
To let her stand on her feet again,
And she will be in love again!

-illsuiOn~

A turning point came in my life,

Dark, very dark and so very quiet,
As if nobody could hear me,
Restless and keen I was, to,
Know what's wrong, why I was,

Surrounded with infinite silence,
I wanted to scream but my voice was choked,
Languid I was, with no hope,
Escape I wanted but had no hope,
Not now, not again,
Tired and fatigued, but couldn't move on,

Groan in agony, as emotions melt from my heart
Result was in tears, leaving my eyes,
Although I loved silence,
Voices but I now wanted for sure,
Eager, bolstering words from my loved ones

-illusiOn~

P.S( Maverick thank you so much for help and you know what i wrote it keeping you in mind, imagining you and myself off course)
P.S.S( Its dedicate to me and maverick exclusively) heheh

My love if its not you but her,
If she is my love,
Whose right now is in my arms
Then why when i close my eyes
I see your image
Why I always try to find you in her
Why her touch doesn't possess the magic
That yours weilded,
Why your touch always ensnared my heart
And hers makes no difference,
Why her closeness doesnt make my heart flutter,
Why eyes of mine search you even when she is around
My love, if its her, why do I then look for you,
And if she is not and you are the one,
So baby just tell me
Why I let you go
My love if its you but not her!

-illlusiOn~

P.S( I dont know why i wrote it.. but yes i wrote it for Tainted Love up coming blogisode.. )